a day of action and change

Today, I was a part of Equality North Carolina's Day of Action. It was a life-changing experience for me on so many levels, I hardly know where to begin. The Day of Action is a lobby day organized by ENC to bring together regular schmucks like me with their state legislators (Representatives and Senators).

I'll be the first to admit that on a local level, I haven't paid much attention to how I'm directly affected by these legislators being in office. At least, not until I started working for a non-profit that works for legislative change for LGBT people. And just like that, as Carrie Bradshaw says, I got it. In many ways, working there has been a learning experience, but mostly because there's just so much that's out there, available to me, that I never even knew about - or worse, never cared to know about. To your left is a photo of me and my personal hero and fellow intern, Stephen.

Today changed so much for me. I went along with my absolutely incredible straight-ally roommate and best friend, Hillary (pictured below), and we got to meet with Sen. Katie Dorsett. I didn't feel nervous or scared, but part of that probably had to do with everyone telling me there was nothing to be nervous and scared about. Besides, these are people from my neighborhood, elected by me, and we were just having a conversation. Sen. Dorsett was a dream to talk to. She was thoughtful, attentive, and actually listened to what I had to say. Although she is incredibly supportive of ENC's initiatives to end school violence and encourage a comprehensive sex-ed program, she admitted that in her heart, she hadn't yet come to be supportive of same-sex marriage.

Now, I know that I'm in North Carolina and getting even a Democratic legislator to support same-sex marriage is a very, very long shot. But I asked her why. She said that she wasn't exactly sure, that she had grown up in Mississippi and mentioned her generational differences, and that she never really had to think about it critically. Which is why it was so important, and so amazing, for me to have the opportunity to speak with her. I was able to be a living, breathing, example of a person who she could potentially discriminate against because she hadn't taken the time to consider the consequences of what she felt. As we spoke more, I made sure to thank her profusely for the support she's shown LGBTers in Greensboro in the past, and encouraged her to continue to let the wheels in her mind keep turning when it came to marriage. I told her that if there was anything I could do to help her understand why, exactly, I'm asking for those rights, that I'd be more than willing. I made sure to tell her that my parents weren't exactly excited about the idea at first, but they came around. Then, Sen. Dorsett surprised me...

"You know, I'm not opposed to it, I just don't know if I feel like they need the term 'marriage,' and I don't know how vocal I would be in supporting it if it came up," or something to that effect.

"I'm not opposed to it." I don't know about you, but to me, that's a big first step. I mean, a huge giant leap. And by the end of our conversation, after I had assured her that it wasn't an attempt to get churches or religions to recognize marriages - rather, just making sure that under the law, we were eligible for the thousands of benefits that are denied to us as a result of our inability to wed. She seemed very receptive to that.

She then asked Hillary and I some questions about where we're from, how we like living in Greensboro, and I made sure to tell her that I love living in Greensboro, because it's one place in the state where I feel like I can be myself, and I thanked her for being a champion for me and for supporting my right to be myself. That was probably my favorite thing I was able to say to her, and I could just tell that it touched her.

Senator Dorsett is an incredible woman, and I knew that after only 5 minutes with her.

This day was incredible on so many levels - because of meetings like the one I just described, which hundreds of our fellow North Carolinians were also doing - but also because of the people I met from across the state. Everyone was so friendly, so positive, and there was an undeniable energy floating through the halls of the NC Legislative Building as we would pass each other on the way to our meetings. I loved meeting the people, of all colors, shapes, sizes, origins, ages, and orientations and felt so very proud to be part of something like that.

The only tinge of negativity for me came when I realized that there are so many young gay people, like myself, who don't realize that this is an option for them - or don't realize how important it is for them to be involved in something like that. As Hillary was just saying to me, "I feel really good about what we did today. I feel like we were a part of change," and you couldn't deny how excited she was just to be a part of something like that. I just wish more of my peers realized what they're being denied, how they're being taken advantage of, and how easy it is to get involved and change hearts and minds. Most surprisingly, it was extremely fun.

I know that Greensboro is considered a liberal stronghold in North Carolina, but Hillary and I were the only people from our district, and 2 of maybe 6 from Greensboro and the surrounding area who actually came. What's worse is that I know probably 50-60 LGBTers in Greensboro, and probably 100's more who are supportive of LGBT rights, but those people were nowhere to be found. I can't blame them for that, nor can I even say it's their responsibility to get involved. I was one of them, not even a year ago. But I took little baby steps in making myself more informed, and once I did, I couldn't NOT do something. I just needed to get involved - and I'm so glad I did. It's the best decision I ever made. Because even if my peers choose not to get involved, or decide that it's simply not for them, I'm honored to work on their behalf and secure those rights for them, because no matter what - I think we all deserve them.

I can't properly write how honored I am to be a part of the movement, and to know the people that I know who have guided me through this process and shown me how easy and effective it is for me to be active in this movement for gay rights. You have changed my life in ways you cannot begin to imagine, and I feel blessed (I'm not even religious) to know and work with you all. We did something very special today, and I'm glad to be a part of it.

P.S. - I saw my dear friend, Dorothy, today. She was there to be a voice for her son. I totally know you're not reading my blog, Dorothy, but you continue to be such an inspiration to me and I love you for the strength you show daily in your effort to make life better for kids like me.